Just as we’ve always been amazed at the high murder count in the TV series Midsomer Murders, the murder rate recently in tranquil Montejaque, our village in the mountains near Ronda, has rocketed, with at least two homicides in the last two days!

Yesterday a neighbour drew my attention to a corpse outside her house.  Was it our Cleo?  No, but it was a dead body for sure, showing signs of having been poisoned.

Then, this morning, we opened our front door and there lay corpse number two, and horror of horrors, this time it was our Cleo.  Stiff as a board! Poisoned! Someone in the village is killing cats!

We know who it is, of course, because she’s done it before, and proudly boasts to those that will listen that any cat that comes onto her property is likely to die from poisoning.

Notwithstanding the upset, the Hausfrau and I are outraged that someone has murdered our pussy cat, just one year old and such a pretty, friendly and home-loving cat.

We rang our vet for advice and I then followed his instructions.  First to the Ayuntamiento to report the issue.  The Policía Local are in no doubt - if these two cats have been poisoned, a crime has been committed and the perpetrator must be brought to book. 

The deputy mayor responsible for such issues has contacted SEPRONA, the Servicio de Protección de la Naturaleza, a part of the Guardia Civil, who will collect the two bodies for autopsy to determine the cause of death.  If the deaths are suspicious, they will investigate.  If the cats have indeed been poisoned, as we suspect, then our “friend” will shortly have her collar felt by the local constabulary. 

At all events, it seems I have to make a denuncia, which I shall, of course, do.

What happens then, we don’t know, but we’re all shocked that a fellow human being could so indiscriminately seek to kill cats and other wildlife that might enter her garden. 

Needless to say, the suspect is not Spanish, but an immigrant like us!

©  Paul Whitelock